I was tubing the Guadalupe river years back and had drank a few too many and fell asleep or passed out laying on my back in the tube. My buddies watched me for a while and said i went through a couple water falls and rapids and never woke up. Well a ways down the river i woke up to a bunch of screaming people. I realized they are screaming at me. There were probably a hundred people in a circle around me on tubes and rafts. As i come to my senses a guy lands about five feet from be and shoots back out of the water ( bungie jumper ).
he scared the chit out of me. I flopped off the tube trying to get away... i just about drowned it scared me so bad i forgot how to swim for a second. This all took place in about ten seconds and was one heck of a rude awakening!
There was a good party one night that a bottle of hot damn was consumed solely
By yours truely. I had fought about five of my good friends. been jumped by a few not so good buddies four on one style because i had hit one of thier wormy little buddies. Long story short i was hitting anyone who tried to talk to me. Well i guess the bbq pit pissed me off and i broke my hand punching it. A school mate laughed at me so i clocked him in the jaw but this guy didnt go down like the rest i guess??!!?$& i woke up the next morning with a splitting head ache swollen hand and my jaw hurting like hell. As i got up i realized i was on a pile of my friends sisters stuffed animals..... Lets just say those stuffed animals had to be thrown away along with my shorts
the last guy had knocked the chit out of me.
One night i had a party at my house and had envited a fine fine fine blonde to the party but she said she would come if she could bring these two friends with her. Typical good looking girl with the typical ugly as homemade soap friends. Anyhow tequila was involved this night. Her two friends were probably 300 lbs on the hoof a did i mention how ugly they were? So.... As the story goes i woke up the next morning in my tool shed out back in nothing but my socks. I walk in the house feeling like death and there is my room mate laughing at me with a few of my buddies doing the same. I put some clothes on and went back to hear the story.... I was told i had had my way with both of the ugly girls at one time out in the shed and that they had watched me. I felt sick at my stomach at this point. They were talking about this for what seemed like an hour. A few days latter my buddie asked me why i have been so down lately and i went on to tell him it was because i had messed around with those two skanks. He about fell out laughing and said that was all a lie just to mess with me. I had passed out in my bed and the two girls did come in my room and undressed me but i couldnt perform thank god. Lol he caught them in the act and helped me to the shed for safe keeping. And told the cows i had left with someone... Some friend huh?
There are a few other good ones... Needless to say i used to drink some
